You are fortunate you saw Me

Shri Mataji used to stay at Jeevan Jyot in 1970 and was known as Nirmala Srivastava. I asked some girls where Nirmala Srivastava stayed and went up. Shri Mataji opened the door and said, “Are you looking for Me?” She held me by hand and took me inside very politely and asked me to sit down. “Where are you coming from?” “I am coming from Dhulia and I have heard your name and came looking for you.” “I am about to start this work and right now I am waiting for my daughter, Kalpana, to have her baby. Once I am through with that, I will call you. Please leave your name and address before you leave and within a month I shall call you.” We all went from Bombay to Bordi in a train with Shri Mataji. We were all together. Mother would talk to all of us. We would follow Her wherever She went. I would never leave Mother, as I wanted to see what Mother did. I would follow Her and do as She directed, without any question.

We all were in some school for the night and after dinner we all went to our rooms and She graciously said, “Look at Raolbai from Dhulia. She always has her attention on what I am doing.” She used to call me “Rajkunwar.” After dinner She would start giving Realization to people. She asked me to keep my hands under Her Lotus Feet. She said I was realized now. She worked on my back like this, raising of the kundalini. Then Mother looked very lovingly and sang a beautiful song, Par Brahma Parmeshwar. She sang so beautifully. That face was so joyous, so loving, happy and, like this, She gave Realization to four or five people till midnight. Next day, She sat alone and called each one individually to give Self Realization. While returning in the train, She asked us whether we had thoughts or not. I said politely that I didn’t know what was happening. Then Mother asked us to put our hands in front of Her and asked whether we felt cool vibrations. Again, I replied innocently that I did not feel anything.

“Raolbai, you are from Dhulia and I want you to come to my house tomorrow. All of you who felt vibrations must meditate every morning and evening, so as to go deep and feel the vibrations.” I used to stay with my daughter in a one room apartment and at around 4 am I was awakened naturally and I was shocked to see Mataji in front of me in the same position as when She gave Self Realization in Bordi.
When next day I met Shri Mataji, She asked me, “Do you get thoughts by putting attention on Me?” I said, “No.” Mataji told me that I had attained my thoughtless state. “What did you see in the morning?” “Mother, I saw you in a meditating pose.” “For all people whom I gave Self Realization yesterday, I was meditating in the morning for them. As you all are new and do not understand, you are fortunate that you saw Me.”